Dear readers,
These blog posts take more time and energy than I imagined. And the pain doesn’t help (just venting).
Anyway, this one is about this blog’s purpose—which I’ve distilled down to three core missions.
Mission 1: Explain
When people ask about my health I reply, I’m okay.
If I trust the person I reply, Not well, but I’m okay.
No one wants to hear about a long, downtrending illness. No one. So sharing it feels…pity seeking. Or worse: self pitying.
It’s not that people are mean. People just want people to be happy. And that’s why I try to hide this depressing truth.
But it turns out this hiding also pushes people away! And if I die suddenly—then they’d be angry they weren’t warned!
People are so complicated. Especially when truth is involved.
So the first mission of this blog is to be transparent to those who know me. It’s to explain my struggles—in ugly detail.
Because then I can reply: I’m not well, but I blog all about it, so I’m okay.
Mission 2: Share
Sometimes, I daydream.
I imagine living just a short walk away from all my family and friends. I imagine growing old together with them. Cue the rainbows and unicorns, but it’s true.
I imagine everyone sharing their good stuff. Stuff not taught in schools. Stuff about healing broken things and making them stronger, that kind of stuff.
It’s not so much the advice as it’s the act of sharing that advice.
Most don’t remember the advice anyway. They only remember the feeling it left behind.
Anyway, that was my dream. And it was sad, because it was out of reach. But then I realized I could make some of it come true. This blog can do that. It can share my good stuff for me. Especially to the ones most dear to me.
So, come. Read. And I’ll be here, sharing.
Mission 3. Inspire
This one’s challenging.
It’s the crux of this blog, the core of my struggles: I want this blog to inspire hope in the lost and hopeless. And that includes me. To be a motivating reminder. Maybe even an instruction manual.
I still don’t know how to express this. The elements are all jumbled up in my head—vulnerability, transparency, authenticity, meaning, hope—and I need to find the right balance between them all. It will be a process.
BTW, I must stress this is all an experiment. Things can go very wrong. But I’m committed.
So, in summary:
- Explain—my situation, background history, status updates.
- Share—important life stuff.
- Inspire—others to find the light in darkness.
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